Love. Sort of.
Part one

Okay, so even though I said I wouldn't, I did. Yes, I did it. Unable to resist, I bought the People Magazine with Britney Spears and her flame of the moment. Oh stop looking at me like that. You so know that the next time you're over you'll read it. Or in Safeway. Or the bookstore.

The fact of the matter is that most of us in the Western World want to know why Britney Spears is getting married to some random guy who is half her weight. Because all of a sudden she's engaged? I think the reason that it shocked me was that here is a woman --or, not quite a woman -- who is not mature enough to admit that she is a role model for tens of thousands of little girls all over the world but thinks that she is somehow mature enough to get married. Isn't there a contradiction in there somewhere?

But. I held out some sort of hope for them; on some level I wanted britney to have a long and happy life with the man she was destined to be with. I wanted Britney to be deeply, passionately and completely in love with Kevin Federline. I wanted her to be a beacon of hope for girls everywhere. So people would look at them and say 'well, they made it. I guess we can too.'

And then I read the article. Oh. My. Goodness. There is nothing here but a "wow". Unbelieveable. Now, I obviously don't have the article with me (at work), but to quote something as closely as I can…

"…I wake up in the morning, look at the ring and think 'very cool'." Thanks for that profound moment, Britney. Anybody who refers to their impending marriage as "very cool" should probably wait a little while to see if maybe the infatuation wears off, eh?

I think everyone who wants to get married should have to write an exam. Because what on earth happens when all those 'feelings' go away, and all you have is this guy who isn't looking so hot anymore (oh, well, he can cook "anything". "Anything" being "macaroni and cheese and fried chicken".)? Marriage is WORK. WORK WORK WORK. And I wish somebody would sit all engaged couples down and tell them to wake up and smell the roses.

Oooh, but the real shocker was something I heard on the radio this morning. Now, prepare yourself while I give you the 4-1-1 on No-Fault divorce.

Essentially what it is: that no matter what the reasons for the divorce (he cheated on her, she killed his cat) everything gets divided up equally. So each half of the ex-couple gets, well. Half. Unless, of course, a good pre-nup is drafted to protect the wealthier party's assets. Now, I don't know which states DON'T have it (I'm assuming Texas…), but California does. And Britney Spears lives in California (yes, you see where I'm going…). And Britney Spears is foregoing the the whole 'pre-nuptual agreement' thing. So. Once Britney is married (sans pre-nup), if it doesn't work out…her husband will get half of everything.

Wow.
I know. Your mind went completely blank, didn't it? Followed swiftly by a why aren't I marrying britney spears?

Anyhow. I'm ashamed for having written a post almost entirely about a pop-princess who is too spoiled for her own good.

Part Two
Barbie and ken broke up. And no, I'm not joking. Because you know, I have a bad record of really stupid entries spawned by boredom. This is serious. Barbie and Ken broke up, and now Barbie is dating Blaise, some dude from Australia.

Don't worry, I'll look into this. But that's what I heard on the radio.
[sighs]
This is really sad. Britney getting married (I bet she's gonna be the only person under the sun whose teeth are whiter than her gown), Barbie and Ken breaking up…what is this world coming to? I'm moving to Jamaica. So I can listen to people talk with cool accents, and drink some sort of hard alcohol and…yes. No, I'm actually moving to Ontario. There won't be cool accents OR much drinking…but….

I have no way to end this post…